Everyday I talk to writers that feel they need to change themselves due to the pressure in today's social media culture to be "cool".

Last week they were secure in themselves and what they wanted to do, rocking with their #wholewriter.

Today they’re confused because what this other person is doing looks so cool and they can’t even remember what they wanted before.

It usually sounds something like this:

“I’ve always wanted to be a writer, but I saw this person doing floral arrangements the other day so now I want to do that! I think it’s time for a change.”

They're not truly interested in this new passion or hobby, but they've seen someone else doing well with it, we want to do well in your own lives, and we're now suddenly convinced that THIS IS THE WAY.

I get it, I've been there myself...but here's what it's really all about.

It’s seeking the easier/faster option, the path that’s already been travelled. The one that seems simple because there's a stick to measure ourselves against. Because taking influence from someone else is so much easier and faster than developing our own purpose, mission and goals, and devoting ourselves to them.

How quickly we discard ourselves and what we do, for fear that it won’t work, or that it’s not “cool” enough.

The Universe has to watch this almost everyday as we're pulled around and influenced by new things - some good, some bad, some completely wrong for us. All it wants to do is pull you back, and remind us:

You don’t need to change yourself, no matter how shiny other people appear, or how cool the next big thing appears to be.

Your path, your identity and your image of yourself will always be growing and expanding.

It WILL be swayed and influenced by different things as you continue to live your life.

But sometimes you can get lit up by someone else’s fire, and subconsciously forget your own.

Sometimes while you're admiring them, you forget everything admirable about yourself. Sometimes we are looking for a quick copy and paste personality from someone else because we’re worried that the choices we’ve made aren’t the right ones. 

You have to trust that the Universe has its own unique plans for you.

You have to listen to your own inner voice, no matter how scary the things are it’s telling you to pursue, for yourself - because that little voice knows what’s best for you. And whenever you feel pulled (by fear) to pursue anything else that will take you off your path, you need to say to yourself:

“Wow, this is amazing, just like my [future self] [work] [mission] is going to be”.

Admire others, be influenced by others, but don’t forget who you are.

No one on this earth is so amazing that you should overwrite yourself trying to become them.

Yes they are cool, and so are you.

Yes they’ve found their way, and so will you.

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Stephanie Lennox is an award-winning author, keynote speaker, holistic writing coach and wellness advocate. She’s also the founder of The Authorship Program®, a 12-week immersive experience that helps writers conquer fear in their creative lives. You can find her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Please share this post: